That saying, you know, "The grass is always greener on the other side." Yeah. I feel it. The thing is I don't think I'd feel this way if I knew more people in LA. I can count on one hand the amount of friends I have here, however unlike in Michigan, those include the people that I wouldn't hang out with all the time. I love them all, but some people I just don't know well enough to say "lets go to coffee," or "lets hit up a movie," at the drop of a hat.
Or, quite the contrary, it could simply mean I'm the kind of girl who doesn't know what I want until I have it, and then I don't want it anymore. I feel like that sentence could have came out of an Audrey Hepburn movie or an Elaine Dundy novel, and normally I'd love to emulate one of those characters, but for now it bothers me. I don't want to be the flighty girl in the movies or novels. I want to be strong. I want to know what I want. I miss the strength I had going into University. I used to have this sense of being that no matter what, I was strong and I didn't need people, I could be okay on my own, but with all the changes that have happened over the last 4 years that has gone away, and I'm left with a sense of vulnerability that I can't shake for the life of me.
I just don't know what I need to do to get that strength back. Suggestions?
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